


Amora The Enchantress Flirts With The Marvel Universe

by SpacePancake



Category: Marvel, Marvel (Comics), Thor (Comics), Young Avengers (Comics)
Genre: Crack Fic, F/F, F/M, Very Dumb, amora is the ultimate thot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-30
Updated: 2018-10-30
Packaged: 2019-08-10 02:41:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16461845
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpacePancake/pseuds/SpacePancake
Summary: A collection of drabbles of people Amora has flirted/slept with/fallen in love with.My girl is the ultimate thot and it deserves to be acknowledged





	Amora The Enchantress Flirts With The Marvel Universe

**Author's Note:**

> \- I only really know Noh-Varr from the Young Avengers, don't kill me  
> \- Everyone's character is exaggerated  
> \- Loki remains young for longer than in the comics, most of the stuff they do other than in YA is ignored and the YA force him back into friendship

Noh-Varr was the worst person Amora had ever met. Everyone she had ever met included Loki, Odin and Lorelei, so him being the absolute worst was something of an achievement.

He criticised fashion as much as she did, but he spoke badly about her. He, in his spandex shorts and terrible terrible helmet, had criticised her fashion multiple times in the past. Whether it be her fringe skirts or boot pants or headpieces, he always found fault with something and it was why he currently held top spot on his number one enemy list.

Not only did he have the worst taste in fashion in the entire multiverse, but he was pretty hot.

She could even say _dashingly_ hot.

It wasn't fair. Why the world had wasted such potential on his sorry ass (which was also pretty nice to look at), she didn't know. Perhaps the Norns had it out for her.

You attempt to take over Asgard _one_ (lie) time and suddenly you're in metaphorical Hel.

She wanted nothing more than to kill him to wipe away his annoying presence, but according to Loki, any of those who had been on the ‘Young Avengers’ with him were off limits.

Amora begrudgingly agreed not to kill any of them (even if squeezing the life from Noh-Varr would be so so satisfying). She could probably beat Loki in a fight, but she'd rather have the god on her side for now. An angry Loki and team of super powered angsty teens was not something she had the energy to deal with.

Besides, Loki had become pretty close with Lorelei lately, and Amora liked to see what she was up to.

It was because of Loki’s connection to the Young Avengers that she met Noh-Varr in the first place.

They had arrived, smashing through a blue star in the air, apparently to yell at Loki a little. Something about ‘even if we don't trust you you're still part of the team’ and ‘you should have kept in contact so we didn't have to smash into your apartment like this’ or whatnot.

Amora, who has only invited Loki here to talk about cute boys, was instantly uninterested in this friendship intervention. She drifted to the back of the room where she kept her supply of alcohol, ready to pull out a casket of Vanaheim mead if it got her through ten minutes of this awful experience (because ten minutes was all she was giving them before they got kicked out).

Someone else seemed equally uninterested in the teamwork conversation and came up by her side. “Can I ask you a question?”

She sighed, not bothering to look at him. “No, it didn't hurt when I fell from heaven. The midgardian understanding of the tenth realm is simplistic and baseless, and-”

“No, no,” He said, “Why are your clothes so fucking ugly?”

She slowly turned to face him, towering over him with her generous height difference. “Pardon?”

“A fringe skirt – are you serious? And the headpiece is highly impractical. What purpose does it even serve?”

“It. Looks. Good.” She gritted out. “And I look _exceptional_ in a fringe skirt, I don't see why you'd imply otherwise.”

“You look ridiculous.”

“At least I look unique. You look like every space man ever. There's nothing special about your clothes, nothing recognisable.”

“So you admit, I'm more in touch with modern cosmic fashion than you are.”

Amora could feel her blood boiling. She could see nothing but red and his awful bland outfit. “Do you wish to repeat that?”

“I think I do.”

“Go ahead, see what will happen.”

He paused, and then, “Boot pants aren't a fashion statement. It's only a bold choice because nobody else is blind enough to wear them.”

She punched him.

Amora had never been one for getting her hands dirty. She was as strong as anybody else on Asgard, but usually fought with careful words and powerful spells. She could see why brute fighters existed now though, punching Noh-Varr was perhaps the most satisfying thing she had ever done.

He stumbled back, drawing his gun out before he had even regained his balance. Amora had already followed suit, her hands lighting up with green flames.

“Amora!” Loki yelled from the other side of the room. “What the actual fuck?”

“Noh-Varr, don't shoot.” One of the young avengers called.

“He started it!” She exclaimed, pointing a finger at Noh-Varr while he, simultaneously, did the exact same thing to her with a yell of “she started it!”

They both looked at each other and glared.

It was the start of the worst rivalry Amora had ever been apart of.

She had gathered ammunition. Seen video footage of Noh-Varr worst outfits. The spandex shorts, the rounded helmet… if he ever tried to insult her again, she'd be ready for him.

She planned to have Loki over again one night a month or so later. Amora has never gotten the full story about her copycat Sylvie Lushton and wanted to know the full story.

“Sorry, Amora, can't make it tonight.”

“Why not?”

“The Young Avengers are having this Halloween party, America will kill me if I don't show up.”

“Can I come?” She asked.

“What?”

“To the party, can I come? I've never celebrated Halloween before.”

Loki sounded hesitant. “I don't know… you're still kinda…”

“Too good for them?” She finished.

“I was going to say evil? In their eyes at least. I don't think they'll want to party with a known villain.”

“They were on a team with you, weren't they?”

“That's different.” Loki tried to argue, but they sighed. “You know what? I'll ask them. But if they say no, you can't do some revenge scheme on them, okay?”

“Yeah, whatever.”

For whatever reason, they agreed to let her come. The person Loki had asked, Kate Bishop had three conditions though.  
No evil shit. No schemes or pranks or big magic displays.  
No punching Noh-Varr  
Bring some asgardian alcohol for the heroes with metabolisms too high for the regular midgardian stuff  
It was a costume party. No ‘sexy’ costumes were allowed. She had to dress up as something considered scary by halloween costume standards (i.e. vampires, werewolves, etc. Loki made it pointedly clear not to actually try to scare anyone).

She tried to negotiate point two to no avail before reluctantly agreeing to her terms.

She halloween costume wouldn't be a problem, she already had the perfect scary outfit in mind.

Magiking herself into her desired clothes was relatively easy. She was ready a full three hours before Loki knocked on the door, ready to escort her to the party.

She opened the door. Loki was in her more feminine form, choosing to be a relatively basic vampire (which was just her in her more gothic clothes with a dribbled of red coming from her mouth).

“Amora, why?” She said, revealing the sharpened canines in her mouth.

Amora had chosen the scariest costume she could think of – Noh-Varr’s uniform. The one with the shorts. She had passed on the helmet though, she couldn't wear such a monstrosity, even as a way of getting revenge. Somehow, she made it work. It wasn't surprising, she made _everything_ work.

“You said to pick scary instead of sexy.”

Loki snorted and shook her head. “Yeah okay, I'm not coming to your defence if Noh-Varr decides to kill you.”

Loki, the gentlelady that she was, teleported both of them to the party. Music blared from speakers and the place (Loki had told her it was where they had celebrated their last victory with the Young Avengers – not that she had attended the actual party itself) was crawling with teens and young adults and those who had recently been young adults. Amora looked young enough to fit into the third category relatively well.

She looked around for her target, but he saw her first.

“Motherfucker!” Came Noh-Varr’s voice.

She looked for the source of the sounds and caught sight of her enemy’s outfit. “That whore!”

Noh-Varr had somehow come up with the exact same idea as her. He wore a pair of striking black boot pants with her iconic green circle design, an open green fringe jacket with no shirt underneath, and a replicate of her current headpiece.

He looked completely ridiculous, even if his abs were pretty on point.

They both marched over to one another.

“You copied me!” She exclaimed.

“How could I copy you?”

“I don't know, but you did!”

Loki walked past them, laughing. “You guys look like you planned this as a couple.” She quickly walked away before Amora could murder her.

“We can't be both dressed like this.” Noh-Varr said.

“Well, just what are we going to do about that?” She challenged.

They both shared a glare for a long drawn out moment.

And maybe their solution was taking off their costumes _completely_ back in Amora’s bedroom, but they would both deny it as long as they lived.

She still despised him with her entire being.

But damn did those boot pants make his legs look good.

 


End file.
